G.I. Joe: Retaliation - (March
28th, 2013): PG-13
Opening Weekend Box Office: #1 with $40,501,8044
Domestic Box Office Gross to-date: $103,214,839
Gross Revenue: $271,514,839
Production Budget: $130 million
Director:
Jon Chu
As I mentioned in the “Short and Sweet” review, the initial
story behind Paramount’s decision to delay the release of G.I. Joe: Retaliation involved a post-production 3D-conversion; such
an announcement wasn’t a big deal until some news hit the Internet, shattering
the hopes that anyone had of the G.I. Joe
franchise improving with this newest installment. Based on the teaser trailer and the
promotional focus on Dwayne Johnson, anyone with reasonable deduction skills
could infer that Channing Tatum wasn’t going to survive the assault which
decimated the military team and set the events into motion for “Retaliation”…unfortunately,
reaction to that development wasn’t exactly ideal. Because Tatum was nowhere near the A-List
when Retaliation was filmed, killing
his character wasn’t as blasphemous as it would be in a current project; but
apparently, test audiences reacted so badly to the film (citing the interaction
between Tatum and Johnson as the ONLY favorable element), that Paramount was
forced to delay release so they could rewrite scenes, bring Tatum back, and schedule
reshoots to increase his screen presence.
Now, The Rise of Cobra didn’t
exactly qualify as a cinematic masterpiece, but it did have enough charm to
attract some very loyal fans, so I have to ask: how could Retaliation screw up so badly that studio executives were willing
to halt release and frantically move to try and execute improvements? If there was one ray of hope, it was that a
nine month delay would result in a significantly better film; so, with some aggressive
marketing featuring the kind of hardcore action and attitude that had been
missing from theaters for months, G.I.
Joe: Retaliation was finally ready to be viewed…in 3D!
At the end of 2009’s Rise of Cobra, it was revealed that Cobra operative Zartan (Arnold
Vosloo) is impersonating the President of the United States (Jonathan Pryce),
and Retaliation begins with the elite
G.I. Joes being framed for the theft of a nuclear arsenal in Pakistan. Now seen as enemies of the state, the entire
Joe team, including Duke (Channing Tatum), is eliminated in a military strike,
with Roadblock (Dwayne Johnson), Flint (D.J. Cotrona), and Lady Jaye (Adrianne
Palicki) being the only survivors.
Concurrently, Cobra operatives Storm Shadow (Byung-hun Lee) and Firefly
(Ray Stevenson) break Cobra Commander (Luke Bracey) out of a maximum security
prison, during which Storm Shadow is injured; as the assassin is recovering in
the Himalayas, G.I. Joe ally Blind Master (RZA) sends Snake Eyes (Ray Park) and
Jinx (Elodie Yung) to capture the fugitive.
As Roadblock, Flint, and Lady Jaye return to the United States, they
deduce Zartan’s deception and seek out General Joseph Colton (Bruce Willis) for
help in avenging their fallen comrades; equipped with new weapons and teaming
up with Jinx and Snake Eyes, our heroes prepare to bring the fight to
Cobra. Unfortunately, the stakes are
raised much higher when it is revealed that Zartan has already unleashed
Project Zeus: kinetic bombardment weapons that have already decimated London
and are currently targeting capitals around the world; so in addition to
clearing their reputations and bringing Cobra to justice, it is once again up
to the G.I. Joes to save the world.
Given my forgiving nature relative to The Rise of Cobra, it wasn’t going to
take much for me to have a positive reaction to Retaliation; so, imagine the pleasant surprise when the first act
of the narrative actually turned out to be a legitimately strong example of
filmmaking. When the team is first
introduced, the combination of gadgetry and military tactics is genuinely cool,
nowhere near the cartoonish style that caused so many to revile the franchise
predecessor…you cannot help but be amped when the Joes take down the nuclear
base. And as far as bromance goes,
Dwayne Johnson and Channing Tatum are hysterical together, and the genuine
chemistry that the two showcase during their limited shared screen time makes
it quite clear why test audiences responded so strongly to that interaction in
the first place. In terms of the other
elements within Retaliation, the action
sequences and one-on-one fights are exciting enough, and Adrianne Palicki will
drop your jaw more than once, but beyond those accolades, there are some major
flaws. As I indicated earlier, the
quality of this sequel takes a very noticeable nosedive once the Joes are
attacked, abandoning any attempts at coherent storytelling or logical character
development and thereby resulting in a bigger failure than the original attempt
to bring the Hasbro characters to life.
Say what you will about the feasibility of the nanotech
warheads or the acting of Sienna Miller in The
Rise of Cobra, but as it stands, that kind of writing and acting actually
deserves Oscar nominations compared to the trash that saturates Retaliation. Within its own cartoonish world, the original
G.I. Joe still exhibited some logical
progression of events and thought, and the same can definitely not be said
about the sequel; it’s hard enough buying that the world’s most elite fighting
force was taken out in a SINGLE attack, but the reaction of the world’s leaders
to Cobra’s grand plan is laughably bad...not even actual cartoons require that
big a stretch of the imagination. It is
also pretty insulting how the script treats some of the more revered franchise
characters like Flint and Storm Shadow; D.J. Cotrona is so wooden and lifeless
that it is hard to believe that the script chose to keep him around instead of
Tatum, and the attempted “redemption” of Storm Shadow makes no sense whatsoever
and only serves to further rob the film of any credibility it may have
possessed. And in terms of the acting,
RZA playing a blind Kung-Fu went as well as anyone could have expected, but
nothing excuses Bruce Willis phoning-in a downright lazy performance…that’s
strike two after A Good Day to Die Hard. With the negatives far outweighing the
positives, G.I. Joe: Retaliation may
only be worth seeing for those hardcore fans of the legendary Hasbro property,
because even with all the shiny weapons and stylish explosions, the shamefully
weak final product cannot be hidden.
Opening over the Easter Holiday Weekend, G.I. Joe: Retaliation pulled in over
$40.5 million, falling short of its predecessor but also earning the
distinction of the second-highest Easter debut behind 2010’s Clash of the Titans and the highest
debut for a Bruce Willis movie. And
thanks to 3D ticket prices and strong international appeal, overseas numbers
have been absolutely through the roof, thereby helping Paramount’s newest
project inch closer and closer to the $300 million mark. Against a $130 million production budget,
those kinds of numbers usually start talks for a sequel, but with a decidedly weak
critical reception, it would be wise for filmmakers to simply quit while they
are ahead, despite the fact that there is room for the story to continue. With so many high-profile summer releases
right around the corner, starting with Oblivion
and Pain & Gain in the next few
weeks, G.I. Joe: Retaliation’s best
days are clearly gone, even though some tweaks could have enabled the Joes to
face down any competitor…and to think, this was a project that was given nine
extra months to improve AFTER audiences saw it.
Put it all together, and G.I. Joe:
Retaliation may have hit the financial bulls-eye, but from a critical
standpoint, there isn’t anything here but mindless entertainment, so don’t get
your hopes up too high.
