Zookeeper - (July 8th, 2011): PG
Distributor: Columbia Pictures (subsidiary of Sony Pictures Entertainment)
Opening Weekend Box-Office: #3 with $20,065,617
Domestic Box-Office Gross to-date: $30,052,466
Gross Revenue: $37,552,466
Production Budget: $80 million
Director: Frank Coraci
From a developmental standpoint, there really wasn’t anything that groundbreaking about Zookeeper, unless you count the fact that it would be Kevin James’ first solo run at the theater after the disappointing Paul Blart: Mall Cop. Given the fact that the film was produced by Happy Madison and thereby guaranteeing a certain brand of humor, it wasn’t surprising in the least that Adam Sandler was going to be lending his voice to one of the animals, but for me, that was anything but a strong selling point. As any of my regular readers know, after the sub-par Grown Ups and the disastrous Just Go With It, I have no problem in declaring that Adam Sandler isn’t funny anymore…if you disagree, go watch the trailer for his newest film, Jack & Jill. Luckily, I still find Kevin James entertaining, and some of the other cast additions (like Ken Jeong and Rosario Dawson or voice actors Sylvester Stallone and Cher) made it look like Zookeeper might actually be worth seeing. Regardless of the cast, some tell-tale signs still warned that Zookeeper could prove disastrous, but I was still convinced that it would take a tremendous effort to screw up a family comedy that featured talking animals.
In perhaps the most appropriately titled film of the summer, Zookeeper follows the recently dumped and perpetually lonely animal caretaker Griffin Keyes (Kevin James). Despite his heartbreak, Griffin takes pride in his role as head zookeeper of the local zoo, working alongside eagle-expert Kate (Rosario Dawson) and reptile specialist Venom (Ken Jeong). When Griffin’s ex-flame Stephanie (Leslie Bibb) resurfaces and hints that she would take him back if he decided to leave the zoo, the loyal animals Griffin cares for decide to break their code of silence. With the help of Joe the lion (Sylvester Stallone), Janet the lioness (Cher), Donald the Capuchin monkey (Adam Sandler), and Bernie the gorilla (Nick Nolte), the zoo animals dedicate themselves to teaching Griffin how to become the alpha male and win Stephanie back without quitting his job. Despite his efforts, Griffin soon finds that he is competing with another one of Stephanie’s ex-boyfriends, Gale (Joe Rogan), and he must soon decide if he is truly willing to change himself for someone who dumped him in the first place.
For balance, I usually like to start my analysis by listing the positive elements of a film, but unfortunately, there aren’t too many present in Zookeeper. I usually enjoy watching Kevin James, and his character is endearing and likable enough, but his antics get old very quickly; imagine over an hour-and-a-half of: “oh look, Griffin fell down…again.” Had the script given a little more screen-time to Ken Jeong or Rosario Dawson, both of whom actually brought some heart and humor to the film, I feel like the end result would have been far more balanced and infinitely more entertaining. As far as the story goes, the concept of a zookeeper finding out that the animals he cares for can talk and have decided to help him was novel enough, but in the end, the filmmakers just couldn’t execute. Being able to identify only two or three mildly funny moments in a family comedy is pretty tragic, and I lay most of the blame on the animals who were supposed to be the stars of the film.
When I first saw the voice cast listing for Zookeeper, I couldn’t believe how grossly misplaced some of the names seemed; Adam Sandler, Jon Favreau, and Maya Rudolph are no strangers to comedy, but how in the hell did Columbia Pictures sign Sylvester Stallone, Nick Nolte, and Cher? To their credit, Stallone, Nolte, and Cher actually ended up providing the most entertaining animal-voices, but that also means that the other voice actors failed horribly. At the top of that dubious list is none other than Adam Sandler…we may have tolerated his buffoonish rambling when he was in Billy Madison or part of the SNL cast, but it’s time for him to grow up…it’s NOT funny anymore. For unknown reasons, most of the “voice talent” decided follow Sandler’s lead and manipulate their voices to try and make the animals sound funny, but it just came across as completely idiotic; I doubt that even five-year-olds were amused by all the pandering. Bottom line, audiences, both young and old alike, deserve far better.
Opening up in third place behind Transformers: Dark of the Moon and Horrible Bosses had to sting a little bit for Zookeeper, but just over $20 million in its opening weekend is still a pretty respectable haul for a family comedy. Unfortunately, this colossal disappointment cost $80 million to make, and with every family either heading to Winnie the Pooh or Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 in the next few weeks, Columbia Pictures is guaranteed to lose money. If Kevin James truly wants to become a movie star, he needs to stop picking projects that continually justify labeling him as Adam Sandler’s new lapdog…looks like you’re off the hook Rob Schneider. If you are looking for a painful way to waste both your time and money, then you should buy your ticket for Zookeeper immediately.
Overall Recommendation: Very Low
